The Satisfaction Of Absent Things [W, 12-14-22]

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith & Life for the Years of Winter: The Satisfaction Of Absent Things [W, 12-14-22]

 

Old people face the coming of Christmas with a particular sort of dread. I’m going to get presents! There is nothing wrong with presents, of course. They are signs that people care about us. Sometimes they are useful. Sometimes fun. Sometimes chocolate. But they add to our supply of stuff. Stuff that we don’t need.

My mother was an especially bad gift receiver. We were young enough when she was old that we did not understand why she did not want stuff, because she needed stuff. One day, about this time of the month of December, Helen and I went to do our usual errands and such for my parents, and Helen took the occasion to try to sneak some gifts in while Mother wasn’t looking. Mother could be observant, though. “What is that?” she demanded. “Stuff,” Helen said. My father, who liked to push Mother’s buttons almost as much as she liked to push his, said, “Don’t you recognize stuff when you see it?

Well, yes, we old people do recognize stuff, and we have too much of it already, and we don’t want more. So, at Christmas we are a real problem to our children, who want to give us stuff. For several years I’ve said, “Stuff we can read or eat, that’s all.” This year I asked for underwear for boys age 4 to 6. The MUSH tree at church {Mittens, Underwear, Sox, Hats} always needs more of that kind of stuff. It also allows me to yell to other old men, “I brought my underwear to church today.”

 

So, here’s an entry from my poetry journal:

THE JOY OF ABSENT STUFF

I gave away some

books this week

a tie and a suit coat

a radio, cassette tapes

a toy bank, a cap

I rejoice in their absence

John Robert McFarland

The above seems a rather short reward for taking the trouble to find your way here, so I’ll repeat one of my favorite stories about daughter Katie Kennedy, the author, [1] since she came to visit us recently and got lost only once. [That she told us about]

I mention that because she is not averse to getting lost. At age 20 she got lost in Moscow intentionally to see if her half semester of Russian language was enough. Spoiler alert: It wasn’t.

But she encountered a young Russian man who wanted to try out his English. He got her back to her hotel. This was in Cold War days, before “Glasnost.” Being a provocateur, she wore a cross around her neck. The young man pointed it out and asked if she were a Christian. When she said she was, he reached into his shirt and pulled out the Russian Orthodox cross around his neck. “Is that why you helped me?” Katie asked, “because I’m a Christian?” “No,” he said. “I helped you because I’m a Christian.”

John Robert McFarland

1] The Constitution Decoded; What Goes Up; Learning to Swear in America.