OLD & PROUD 2-4-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith & Life for the Years of Winter

Cole Porter may not agree that 2 out of 3 ain’t bad, but he ain’t necessarily right. [1] He got only the last two right for the title of my birthday song: I’m not bewitched, but I am bothered and, mostly, bewildered.

So many questions… How did this happen? Why was it so fast? Why do other people my age seem so old? Where are my glasses? What should I do when I grow up?

At last I’m in the top 2%. No, not the top 2% financially. I’m in the top 2% of the grim reaper’s list. Today I start my 9^th decade.

I was hoping to let this pass by unnoticed, so I would not have to deal with it, but my wife secretly [until someone unintentionally blew her cover] conspired with several folks to make sure I received a whole bunch of really neat cards and letters, some from people I’ve never even met. It’s sort of nice to be noticed even when you don’t want to be.

I remember when we had class officer elections at the end of our junior year in high school. I had been class president for three years. I told my classmates as the election came near, “Please don’t elect me as class president again. I will be editor of the school newspaper next year, and since I want a career in journalism, it’s important I spend all my time on that.” They graciously accepted my demurrer and elected my good friend, Mike Dickey.

It was only then that I realized: I really wanted them to rise up and say, “Oh, no, you have been our president forever. You have done such a wonderful job. We can’t possibly get along without you as president.”

I learned two lessons: 1] It’s better to say what you mean, even if you don’t know what you mean. [2] You can be right even when you don’t mean to be, because Mike was an excellent president, and I dropped out of school in mid-year to work in a factory and could not have fulfilled class president duties, and I did not have a career in journalism.

So, yes, I’ll say what I mean: I’m old, and I’m proud. Thanks for noticing.

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

I tweet as yooper1721.

1] Yes, I know that’s the Gershwins; don’t get picky.

Wishing for a Different Day-a poem 4-3-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith & Life for the Years of Winter

I wish the day had started

in a different way, on a different

note, with my brain filled

with the flowers of hope

instead of the weeds of despair

I would sing if I could

Woke up this morning, with my mind

stayed on Jesus

But I woke up this morning with my mind

stayed on those who will us harm

and they are so many

Still, I say

this is the day the Lord has made

Let us rejoice and be glad in it

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

You Are What You Wear-a poem

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Life and Faith for the Years of Winter

When I am beside myself

Or out of sorts

I look to my clothes to find out

Who I am

Perhaps because they stand firm

Against the stylish whimsies of the day

These brown shoes and gray socks

Tan cargo pants and plaid shirt

I know the folds of pants and ribs of socks

Better than I know the folds of flesh and ribs of bone

Of my own body

They shall outlast my body

And go to homeless men

Who sit on corners of the street and beg

The way I am begging for your attention now

By asking you to think about my clothes

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

JOYFULLY SUBVERSIVE 2-1-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith For the Years of Winter…

I was distraught recently when the IU men’s basketball team lost to Northwestern, but I could not help being happy for the NW folks. They were so happy at their victory. Not gloating, nor even gleeful, but joy-full. NW basketball folks have had to be good losers for a long time; now they are good winners.

There’s not much of that these days. Current political winners are so joyless. They laugh occasionally, but only at the misfortunes of others. They gloat, but there’s no joy for them, because they think winning is about power to be greedy, to be unkind to others, to be mean and not be accountable for their meanness. That’s a sure recipe for non-joy. Their victories are such glum and grim affairs.

I think that a sure sign of the presence of God is the presence of joy. These days the joy is in subverting the power of those who are unjust and immoral. There’s no point in subverting injustice and immorality if you can’t have fun doing it. Well, actually there is, but it’s more fun if you have a song to sing…

I sing it to the tune of R. Kelso Carter’s “Standing on the Promises,” a hymn perhaps unknown to some Christians who are better known for “sitting on the premises.” [Old preacher joke. I can resist any temptation except a bad joke.] Since it is traditional to note the biblical foundations for hymns, I have done so, line by line. Happy February, by the way.

JOYFULLY SUBVERSIVE

Joyfully subversive as we laugh and sing                        [Judges 5:21.]

To the work of God divine our gifts we bring                 [John 9:4.]

Carried to the righteous fray upon God’s wing               [Isaiah 40:31.]

Joyfully subverting as we go.                                         [Romans 12:2.]

CHORUS

Joyful! Subversive!

Let us join our voices in God’s loving song                    [I John 4:8.]

Subversive! Joyful!

Standing firm against injustice we are strong                   [I Cors. 16:13.]

VERSE 2

Subverting hate and prejudice with love divine               [Romans 8:38-39.]

Offering to each hopeful mouth the bread and wine        [Luke 22:19.]

With god’s children everywhere we shall dine                [Mark 2:16.]

Joyfully subverting as we go                                          [Romans 12:2.]

CHORUS

Joyful! Subversive!

Let us join our voices in God’s loving song                    [I John 4:8.]

Subversive! Joyful!

Standing firm against injustice we are strong                   [I Cors. 16:13.]

VERSE 3

Joyfully subversive we stand with the poor                     [Matthew 25:31-46.]

And beat our fists against oppression’s heavy door        [Galatians 3:1.]

We’ll sing and work until injustice is no more                 [Isaiah 11:6. Amos 5:24.]

Joyfully subverting as we go                                          [Romans 12:1.]

CHORUS

Joyful! Subversive!

Let us join our voices in God’s loving song                    [I John 4:8.]

Subversive! Joyful!

Standing firm against injustice we are strong                   [I Cors. 16:13.]

VERSE 4

When they draw a circle tight to hide within                   [Galatians 3:23.]

When they say we can’t come in because we’re sin       [Galatians 3:28-29.]

We shall draw a circle that will take them in                   [Acts 10:28.]

Joyfully subverting as we go                                          [Romans 12:1.]

CHORUS

Joyful! Subversive!

Let us join our voices in God’s loving song                    [I John 4:8.]

Subversive! Joyful!

Standing firm against injustice we are strong                   [I Cors. 16:13.]

VERSE 5

When our days of marching here will be no more           [Matthew 25:23.]

We’ll keep singing as we land on heaven’s shore.          [Luke 6:20.]

While those we served and loved shall open up the door            [Revelation 21:25.]

Joyfully subverting as we go.                                         [Romans 12:1.]

CHORUS

Joyful! Subversive!

Let us join our voices in God’s loving song                    [I John 4:8.]

Subversive! Joyful!

Standing firm against injustice we are strong                   [I Cors. 16:13.]

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

I tweet as yooper1721.

For those questioning their memories, or mine: yes, I posted this a year or three back.

ANOTHER GOOD REASON FOR A MEMORIAL SERVICE 1-31-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith and Life for the Years of Winter

On January 29, I mentioned my discomfort with obits that say there will be no funeral or memorial service because that’s what the deceased decreed.

Izak Denisen, the nomme de plume of Karin Blixen, who wrote Out of Africa, says, “Any sorrow can be borne if a story can be told about it.”

There is always some emotion to be worked through by those who are left when a death occurs—grief, anger, guilt, sorrow, etc. We do that by sharing stories.

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

I tweet as yooper 1721.

For years I have kept a careful index of stories and ideas I have used in this column so that I don’t remember. That’s cumbersome and time consuming and I forget to check it before I write anyway. I’m just going to trust that when I repeat, you are old enough that you won’t notice because you have lost either your memory or your marbles. [Remember how exciting it was to play marbles on the playground at recess? And how gruesome it was when you lost your favorite? I especially liked the way we played it when I moved to Oakland City at age10: There was a metal Maxwell House tin turned upside down, with a holdecut in the middle. We’d stand and drop a marble from eye level at the hole. If you missed, it bounced so high…}

RIP, MTM 1-30-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Life and Faith for the Years of Winter

Why are so many of us grieving the passing of Mary Tyler Moore? Well, we all knew her. She was pretty and talented and smart, a good guest in our homes on a regular basis, mostly as Mary Richards, the associate producer at WJM-TV in Minneapolis, on The Mary Tyler Moore Show in the 1970s.

More, though, Mary Richards was an icon, folks say. As Richards, MTM took on the issues of sexuality and economics and role expectations for women in the aftermath of Vietnam and the 1960s in a way that was more palatable, and thus more productive, than the feminism of Betty Friedan and Gloria Steinem.

I enjoyed the humor of the show, as when Mr. Grant tried to explain to Mary that a man doing the same job as hers ought to make more money just because he was a man, but gender equality was not a real issue for me. I had two daughters. I was already convinced.

Maybe that’s why I enjoyed the show so much, not because it took on the issues those daughters would face, but because we shared it with our girls. Remembering MTM, I think of how we watched that show together. [1] Our daughters were just entering their teens. Mary Richards was a good role model for girls of that age, who were going to have to face challenges for which no one had any experience. Quietly but persistently, without sacrificing anything of what is central to being a woman, she insisted that a girl should be free in the same way as a boy to do whatever God gives you to do.

There’s another reason, though, that I didn’t think MTM was really iconic. She wasn’t any different from the girls I grew up with. She was only 37 days older than I. Had she lived in the poor white section of Indianapolis and not gone to a private girls school in California, we would have been in the same grade. Although I did not meet her [via TV] until we were in our early twenties, she could easily have been in my high school class in Oakland City. She had that great look about her, that sparkle, that “spunk” that Mr. Grant so deplored. [2] She would have been very popular in our class, but she would not have been either the prettiest girl or the smartest girl there. She would have been just one more girl I was madly in love with and afraid to ask for a date.

That’s plenty enough reason to mourn her passing. RIP, MTM

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

I tweet as yooper1721.

1] We watched the whole CBS Saturday night lineup. Along with MTM, there was All In the Family, MASH, The Carol Burnett Show, The Bob Newhart Show. It’s hard to believe there ever was or ever will be a single evening with a whole series of shows of that quality.

2] Mr. Kell, our principal, was an excellent man, but he would probably have deplored that spunkiness, too.

EULOGY VIRTUES AND ENEMY LOVING 1-29-17

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith for the Years of Winter

My son-in-law, Patrick, had a birthday Friday. That got me to thinking about how he has provided such a good eulogy. He’ll have more opportunities to add to his resume, but his eulogy is set, because it is based on character, not achievements.

David Brooks, in his excellent book The Road to Character, talks about the difference between resume virtues and eulogy virtues. Those for the resume are your worldly accomplishments—jobs, awards, honors, etc. Virtues for your eulogy, what people will say about you when you are dead, are harder to categorize.

I am intrigued by obituaries that say, “There will be no memorial service at the request of the deceased.” It makes me wonder, “How controlling of others was this person in life, to want to keep controlling even in death?” Are we not allowed to share memories of him or her at all? Shouldn’t we at least get together and sing “Please don’t talk about me when I’m gone…?”

Of course, some folks are hard to eulogize. I recall the pastor who was tasked with the unenviable task of doing the funeral for the town’s meanest man. He worked and worked and the best he could come up with was, “At least he wasn’t as bad as his brother.”

Reading Brooks’ book has got me to thinking about my eulogy and I have realized that maybe I should request no memorial service myself. I don’t want folks to think they can’t find anything good to say. My brother is a very nice person, so even that line won’t work.  

When we lived in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, I was sure I would freeze to death at any moment, so I tried writing my own obituary. All the obits up there started with “He loved the great outdoors.” Personally I prefer to be warm and eat pie, rather than being cold and eating jerky, so I started my obituary with “He loved the great indoors.” That’s still true, but now there is a TV sitcom by that name, and it’s not very funny. I don’t want people to think I love it, or even like it.

I start the day by scribbling a poem, whatever comes to mind, to get my creativity going. Then I read scripture and a real poem by someone like Billy Collins or Elaine Palencia, and I read from some insightful contemporary author, like Anne Lamott or Rachel Remen. Or David Brooks. My personal scripture lectionary includes a history book, a prophet, Psalms, a Gospel, and an epistle. Today Luke 6:32 ff came up as the Gospel. “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you…” Jesus ends that passage with, “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you…”

That was intriguing, for as I wrote my daily poem, I tried to line it as my obituary, without much success. I was trying to say, poetically, “He loved his family and his friends,” and that admonition of Jesus popped into my head, “If you love only those who love you…” Then here it was in my daily readings, too. Apparently this bit about loving your enemies is something I need to hear.

JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com