CHRIST
IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith for the Years of Winter… ©
I am reading Adam Begley’s
biography of John Updike, the best writer of the 20th century, as
far as I am concerned.
Everyone who knew Updike
seems to agree that early on he decided that he could not be successful both as
a writer and as a person, and he chose to be a writer. He chose to be a human
doing instead of a human being.
That is just one of the
reasons that he is a famous writer and I am not. I can remember the moment,
when our first child was born, that I decided that I would put personal success
ahead of professional success. I thought it might be possible to be successful
in both, but I knew, as Updike did, that you have to choose which will be
first.
I often slipped off my
chosen path, though. There are certain jobs, and ministry seems to be chief
among them, where you are praised for neglecting personal relationships. With
the ministry, there is much to do, busyness, yes, but there is the added
incentive that you are “doing God’s work.” Who can argue with that?
Sports figures are
actually praised for neglecting their families. “He’s so committed he sleeps in
his office.” “He leaves his wife and baby and goes in early to get extra
batting practice.” It’s called “work ethic.” It destroys relationships as much,
if not more, than “lazy ethic.” I remember one of Florida State football coach
Bobby Bowden’s sons saying that his father was always so busy at his job that
he saw only one of his own son’s high school football games, and that was when
he was there to scout another player.
I know people who chose
personal success and were also successful professionally. Part of the
professional success was because they worked on personhood first.
I do not know anyone who
chose profession over personhood who was successful at both. Interior success
can enhance exterior activities. It does not seem to work the other way around.
Some old people keep on
doing what they have always one because their identity is so solely in external
activities that they have to keep on the job for their life to have meaning.
One of the great benefits
of retirement is that you have a chance to make that choice again. Professional
life is over. You can choose being over doing.
John
Robert McFarland
johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com
I
started this blog several years ago, when we followed the grandchildren to “the
place of winter,” Iron Mountain, in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula [The UP]. Thus
the title. We now live in Bloomington, IN, “the place of basketball.” I’m not
changing the title, though.
I
tweet as yooper1721.
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