BE ATTITUDES

CHRIST IN WINTER: Reflections on Faith for the Years of Winter… ©

When I was trying to survive cancer, I read two seemingly contradictory theories about getting well. One said you had a better chance of getting well if you did things for others. The second study said you had a better chance of getting well if you refused to do things for others. Neither was quite right. You have a better chance of getting well if you do things for others if you really want to and better chance of getting well if you refuse to do things for others if you are doing them only out of a sense of obligation.

A few days ago I said I would post something new every day, even if it were not worth posting, because I did not want to disappoint anyone who came to this blog hoping for something new. I felt the responsibility to provide something new each day. I should understand myself well enough by now to know that was the death knell of every-day blog posts. Sure enough, I promptly missed several days. I can get it done only if I want to, not if I’m doing it out of a sense of obligation.

Now some things we need to do, even if we don’t want to, even if we do them out of obligation. They’ll go better, though, if we decide to like them, or at least put a limit on them.

I heard Bill Schutz, the psychologist, tell of how he had gone to a party because he had to. He hadn’t been there long when he developed a sore throat. Obviously he had picked up a germ and was getting sick. So he agreed with himself that he would stay for only half an hour and then leave and go home and be sick. “Then,” he said, “I started talking to people, knowing I would leave soon. The half an hour was quickly up, but I was having a good time, and my throat stopped being sore, and I stayed the whole party.”

Will Rogers used to say, “A man’s just about as happy as he makes up his mind to be.”

 JRMcF

johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com

I tweet as yooper1721.

My book, NOW THAT I HAVE CANCER I AM WHOLE: Reflections on Life and Healing for Cancer Patients and Those Who Love Them, is published in two editions by AndrewsMcMeel, in audio by HarperAudio, and in Czech and Japanese translations. It’s incredibly inexpensive at many sites on the web.