CHRIST IN WINTER:
Reflections on Faith for the Years of Winter… ©
Knowing that I loved
baseball, and the Cincinnati Reds especially, and with spring training
scheduled to begin, people thought they should talk baseball to me as I lay
there in my bare hospital room. Any other February I would have been happy to
talk baseball. But I had just found out that I was going to die. Baseball
simply didn’t seem very important.
On top of that, a bunch of
greedy billionaires [owners] was trying to keep a bunch of greedy millionaires
[players] from playing ball at all if they kept insisting on getting a bigger
share of the profit from $12 beers, or something like that. A lock-out was
looming. Maybe there would be no spring training. Maybe there would be no
baseball season at all.
That got my attention.
Baseball was not so irrelevant after all. Baseball and I were in the same
deserted dugout. We might die together. I suddenly cared. I did not want a
lock-out, for baseball or for myself. I wanted a winning season. I wanted a
healing season.
I got the idea that if the
season could go on, and if my team, the Reds, won, against all odds and
history, since their last World Series title was in 1976, the era of The Big
Red Machine of Johnny Bench and Joe Morgan and Pete Rose and Tony Perez, that I
would get well.
It happened. They won
their first game on opening day, and were in first place all the way through
the World Series. Game by game, week by week, month by month, we went through
the season together, the Reds on the field, me in the chemo room. We didn’t win
every game. We had injuries and had to play through them. We sometimes missed
bunt signals, sometimes failed to advance the runner. It was not a perfect
season, but what a winning season! What a healing season!
When the season was over,
I knew I was healed. I might not be cured, but I was healed, made whole. I did
not know how long I would live, but that now was irrelevant. What mattered was
the healing, and the Reds and I had played and won our healing season.
So I started to write a
book, The Healing Season. It’s a good
title, isn’t it, with its double meaning? I used the winning season of the Reds
as the outline, week by week, month by month, noting the wins and losses and
drama in Riverfront Stadium, but using those episodes to share what I had gone
through in the chemo room and in my mind, and what I had learned about healing
of the soul. It was a pretty good book, but it stalled. I had talked of many of
the same episodes and insights in NOW
THAT I HAVE CANCER I AM WHOLE: Reflections on Life and Healing for Cancer
Patients and Those Who Love Them. That book was appropriate for any cancer
patient or “those who love them,” not just those who appreciated baseball, not
just those who followed the Reds. In fact, it might even be insulting and
injurious to hopeful patients who did not get winning seasons from their teams.
I mean, if you could not get healed if you team did not win, Cubs fans would be
extinct.
The Healing Season will never get finished, for it was lost in the great computer crash of
’03, but every spring training presents another opportunity for hope for all of
us who need healing. Maybe our team will win. And if not, “take me out to the
ballgame,” anyway. That’s where the action is.
JRMcF
johnrobertmcfarland@gmail.com
I tweet as yooper1721.
NOW THAT I HAVE CANCER I AM WHOLE: Reflections on Life
and Healing for Cancer Patients and Those Who Love Them, is published in two editions by AndrewsMcMeel, in
audio by HarperAudio, and in Czech and Japanese translations. It’s incredibly
inexpensive at many sites on the web.
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